Priorities

I've been mulling something around in my head for a long time and finally have gotten to the point where I need to do something about my thoughts. I see that I need to honestly reevaluate my life, set priorities, and honor them. As a result, I'm going to be scaling back Kohleidoscope.

When I first started doing things, I had in mind a nice way to knit and create without having all the products loitering around my home (seriously, how many scarves and bags does one need?) It was based on a way for me to enhance and continue my enjoyment of creating.

Success came, but along with it came expectations and pressure to expand and grow and get big and involved. Soon words like "Retail" and "Wholesale" and "Productivity" and "Deduction" and "Taxes" started rolling in. With each use of these words, my whole body would clinch up. My body was telling me "NO NO NO," but I kept on doing it, kept on discussing it, kept on keeping on. But I would then find myself hitting the yarn shop to get stuff for a project and feeling resentful and overwhelmed.

This is not what I had in mind when I started saying that my creations came from Kohleidoscope. Things are no longer enjoyable for me. I find myself not wanting to do anything - not even for myself. And to me, that's not okay. The possible income that I might bring in is not worth the loss of release and relaxation and enjoyment that I get from creating.

So, I'm going back to doing things for myself and for other folks, upon request. I'll still be designing new things, I'll still be obsessed with fibers. I'll still make things for you and for anyone else who asks (and yes, I'll still charge something for them - although I might do more trade and barter or you can pay me in sushi, you know, but cash always fits!) I'll be lovingly and happily maintaining my relationship with
Ozark Handspun (I'm LOVING spinning,) and will continue to design creations using OH and making things for Dave to use to promote OH. But I'm going to go back to Kohleidoscope being a hobby, not a Business. I'm releasing the idea of selling things in stores (really not something I was interested in anyway -I felt it lost the personal touch that way.) I'm releasing the idea of being a huge success with Kohleidoscope - I'd rather be a huge success at being a woman, a friend, a person, a mother, a wife, a teacher, a human. When I'm stressed out trying to make myself a commercial success, I fail miserably with personal success.

http://knit-pics.blogspot.com/ will still be up and running and I'll continue to post pictures of what I"m working on, what I've done.

I am so grateful for everyone's support and encouragement. Thank you. I cannot tell you what it means to me. B and I do have big plans for Kohleidoscope's future. In the upcoming years, we can see a storefront in our life. Kohleidscope is not ending, not closing - it's just remodeling. For the first time in history, downsizing is a very positive thing.