Night and Day

I went to bed last night still reeling from the birth a few days ago.  I don't know what happened at that birth, but something traumatic did and I am very clearly showing the signs of post traumatic stress disorder (um, yes, it does happen in the birth field and it's gnarly.)  I don't know what in the world happened, but it grabbed me and grabbed ahold of me hard.  It's going to take a long time to process. 

 

So, I slipped into bed early, grateful that DDFF is back home from Austin and can swing the client we have due in early March. While she is a lovely woman, attending another birth so soon didn't sound like something I'd be excited about.

 

11:38, the phone rings.  March Mama is in labor.

11:40, call DDFF.  How do you want to do this, partner?  I'll go, she says, but I have another client who's playing around with labor and she has x-y-z complications.  If she goes, I'll  need to call you and have you go to March Mama.

11:45, crawl back into bed and secretly say a vow of eternal love for DDFF.

1:30 am, phone rings.  DDFF's other client is doing it - I have to go do March Mama.

1:35 - 4:30, doze and dread, doze and dread, doze and dread.  No child care available today, I'm not in the right mental place.  How in the hell?

4:38, phone rings.  March Papa says, "it's moving and she cannot hack it, we're going to the hospital - meet us there. Yes, we know this is against our birth plan, no we don't care."

5:09 meet them at the hospital.  March Mama is 9 cm dilated and baby is moving down.  No wonder it was intense!

7:37 am, beautiful baby girl F enters the world with tiny, gentle pushes.  She is 6 pounds 14 ounces and perfect. 

8:30, leave new March family in their room, all of them eating.  Mama and Papa from the cafeteria, Baby F from her mama's breast.

 

This is the way it is supposed to be.  This was a healing birth for me and for my client.  Everyone was warm and loving and gentle.  I was blessed to be at this birth - things happen for a reason.

 

Welcome to the world, little Miss F.  M & J, you rock the casbah, folks.  Thanks for letting me be a part of your miracle.